Thursday, April 15, 2010

Thoughts about Mothers

About a month ago my good friends found out that their mother's cancer was back and that she was very ill and beyond treatments. It's been a very rough month for their family and will only get worse as the end gets closer. I've struggled so much with wanting to do something but being completely impotent other than random homemade deliveries and being there for Ju when she needs a Lost break. Today she shared the news about her mom with a bunch of her closest friends and also included a link to her sister's blog where sweet Emily had written a very special tribute to their mother. There I was, sitting in my office holding my phone up to my eyes so I could read the text with tears streaming down my face. The tears were getting in the way when my phone was sitting on my desk so I had to hold it up so I could actually read. Emily is an incredible writer and had so many wonderful things to say about their mom and about how time has been for their family. I couldn't control the tears and finally had to have my friend Z distract me with random conversation so that I could stop crying. I'm so sad for my friends and their family and for the fact that they are literally watching their mother slip away but also because there's no way to experience this with someone you love and not think about it happening to you. Of course my parents drive me bonkers. They are both so kind and good to me and I love them dearly but as hard as they try to relate to me they have no idea what my life is like and no real concept of the things that I go through. Even with all of that and the normal and not-so-normal struggles that we face I cannot imagine my life without them--thus the tears and the fact that I'm crying yet again. To my mom and to all of the other mothers in my world thank you so much for your example and for the gifts that you share with me every day. To Nate and Emily and Julia I wish you peace.

1 comment:

Wendi said...

None of us are getting any younger and I suppose we'll all probably have to go through some kind of similar situation in the years to come. Not a fun thought. I truly believe that we go to a better place when we die. But it's sure difficult for the people who are left behind. Thanks for the peek at your more sentimental side, Ang. Love you! :)